Here are some mantras or principles for a healthy and wise marriage:
- Love is a verb
“Love is a verb” is a powerful statement that suggests love is not just a feeling or emotion but an action that requires effort, commitment, and dedication. When we say “I love you,” it’s not just about expressing our feelings, but it’s also about showing love through our actions, such as being kind, supportive, and understanding towards our partner.
In a relationship, it’s not enough to just feel love towards our partner, we need to actively demonstrate our love and commitment through our behavior and actions. This means doing things that make our partner happy, being there for them in times of need, and making sacrifices to ensure their well-being.
When we treat love as a verb, it becomes something that we actively cultivate and nurture in our relationships, rather than something that we passively experience or feel. This mindset can help us to build stronger, more fulfilling relationships and deepen our emotional connection with our partner.
- Conflict is growth trying to happen
The statement “Conflict is growth trying to happen” suggests that conflict in a relationship is not necessarily a bad thing, but rather an opportunity for growth and development. When conflicts arise, it often means that there are underlying issues or differences that need to be addressed and resolved. By working through these conflicts together, couples have the opportunity to learn more about each other, deepen their understanding and empathy, and ultimately strengthen their relationship.
Conflict can be uncomfortable and challenging, but it can also be a catalyst for positive change. When couples face conflicts head-on and work through them in a constructive and respectful manner, they have the opportunity to grow and develop as individuals and as a couple.
Of course, it’s important to note that not all conflicts are productive or healthy. Some conflicts may be destructive or abusive, and in these cases, it’s important to seek help and support. However, for conflicts that arise in the context of a healthy and respectful relationship, the statement “Conflict is growth trying to happen” can be a helpful perspective to keep in mind.
- If you listen long enough, everyone makes sense
The statement “If you listen long enough, everyone makes sense” suggests that if we take the time to truly listen to someone and understand their perspective, we can come to a place of empathy and understanding, even if we initially disagree with them.
Often, disagreements and conflicts arise because we have different viewpoints or experiences, and we may not fully understand where the other person is coming from. However, if we are willing to listen to their perspective with an open mind and without judgment, we may start to see things from their point of view, and find common ground.
Of course, this does not mean that we will always agree with everyone, or that we should abandon our own values or beliefs. However, by being open to listening and understanding others, we can build stronger relationships, improve communication, and find more effective ways to work through conflicts and disagreements.
In short, the statement “If you listen long enough, everyone makes sense” reminds us of the importance of empathy, active listening, and seeking to understand others, even when we disagree with them.
- If it’s hysterical, it’s historical
The statement “If it’s hysterical, it’s historical” suggests that when we have a strong emotional reaction to something in the present, it may be linked to unresolved issues or traumas from our past. In other words, the emotions we feel in the present may be rooted in our personal history.
For example, if someone becomes extremely upset or angry in response to a seemingly minor incident, it may be because that incident triggered a deep-seated emotional response that stems from past experiences or traumas. By recognizing this connection between our past and present emotions, we can start to understand and work through the underlying issues that are causing our strong reactions.
This statement highlights the importance of being aware of our emotional responses and exploring the root causes of those emotions. By doing so, we can gain a deeper understanding of ourselves, our behaviors, and our relationships, and ultimately find more effective ways to manage our emotions and work through past traumas.
However, it’s important to note that this statement should not be used to dismiss or invalidate someone’s current emotional experience. Instead, it should be used as a tool for self-reflection and personal growth, to help us better understand ourselves and our emotions.
- You can be right or you can be in relationship
The statement “You can be right or you can be in relationship” suggests that sometimes, our desire to be right or to prove our point can get in the way of our relationships with others. In other words, we may be so focused on being right that we forget about the importance of compromise, empathy, and understanding in building healthy and fulfilling relationships.
While being right can feel satisfying in the moment, it’s often not worth sacrificing our relationships with others. Relationships require give and take, and sometimes that means letting go of the need to be right in order to maintain harmony and connection with the people we care about.
This statement reminds us that relationships are not about winning or losing, but about mutual respect, empathy, and understanding. By prioritizing our relationships over our desire to be right, we can build stronger connections with others, deepen our understanding and empathy, and ultimately create more fulfilling and meaningful relationships.
Of course, this does not mean that we should always compromise our values or beliefs in order to maintain relationships. Rather, it means finding a balance between standing up for ourselves and respecting others, and recognizing that sometimes, being right is not worth sacrificing our relationships.
CONCLUSION
In conclusion, these five mantras all offer valuable insights and perspectives on relationships and personal growth. “Love is a verb” reminds us that love is not just a feeling, but an action that requires effort and commitment. “Conflict is growth trying to happen” reminds us that conflicts and disagreements can be opportunities for growth and development in our relationships. “If you listen long enough, everyone makes sense” encourages us to practice empathy and active listening in our interactions with others. “If it’s hysterical, it’s historical” reminds us to be aware of the underlying issues and traumas that may be driving our emotional responses. Finally, “You can be right or you can be in relationship” encourages us to prioritize our relationships over our desire to be right. By embracing these mantras and incorporating them into our lives, we can cultivate healthier, more fulfilling relationships and deepen our personal growth and development.